THIS IS THE OFFICIAL ¡BALLABAJOOMBA SLAM!
"EMCEE SPIEL"(adopted from the official spiel at Nationals)
. . .
POETS: Each of you will have three minutes to
perform one poem of your own construction. No props,
costumes, animal acts, or musical accompaniment are allowed.
Each poem will be scored by our panel of five judges chosen
randomly from the audience. We'll drop the high and low
scores. Eight poets with best scores in the first round will
move to the second round. Four poets with the best
cumulative scores will move to the 3rd round. At this
moment the slate will be cleared. The poet with the best
score in the 3rd round wins the first place.
AUDIENCE: This is a listening place. Please give your
attention to the poets while they are performing. After the
poem is finished, respond to the poets AND the judges in any
way you think is appropriate. Your job is to influence
judges, in any way you feel fit.
JUDGES: We use the word "poem" to include text and
performance taken together. Please, give each poem only
one score on a scale from 0.0 (= the worst possible
poem) to 10.0 (= the perfect poem).
- 10.0 would be an earth shattering text performed
perfectly that causes simultaneous orgasm throughout the
- 0.0 goes to the worst possible poem imaginable
performed by someone who should not quit his/her day job,
and 10.0 goes to a poem performed perfectly
- NOW AGAIN: ZERO MEANS "BOOTY" / TEN MEANS "DA
Please use only one decimal place, as this helps avoid
The audience may try to influence you; they may applaud you
or boo you. That's their prerogative. Please remember that
in a quiet poem, the audience has no way to communicate what
they're experiencing. Don't be influenced by the audience or
the other judges. Give the poem the score that YOU think it
deserves. Remain consistent with yourself.
POETS (AGAIN): Judges are NOT experts; they are our
public! The integral part of slamming performance is that
dealing with a crowd that sometimes might want to talk
back,. So whether you incorporate audience response into
your poem, ignore it, get your feelings hurt, or just plain
talk back, it's up to you, poets, to move YOUR audience. BE
A GOOD SPORT! Whether you win or lose, BAD SPORTS WILL NOT
BE SUFFERED HERE AT THE ¡BALLABAJOOMBA SLAM! Those who
cannot respect this place and people gathered here, please
get lost in the sea where sharks will take care of you. Even
better, get a day job!
ABOVE ALL ELSE: EVERYBODY HAVE FUN!!! IT'S A